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I was reading over at Girltalk a while back and it hit me like a ton of bricks: I am vain.

Before children, I was thin without making any effort. I wasn't athletic, I ate what I wanted and I just was skinny.

Mothers out there know what bizarre things happen to a woman's body when she's pregnant! For me, it meant keeping ten pounds or so from every baby as a kind of souvenir.

I've been focusing lately on losing weight. I've been running, walking, lifting. I've dropped 7 pounds so far, with only 8 more to go to get back to where I was when I got pregnant this last time.

But it's occured to me that my whole motivation is to "look better". Why should this matter to me? Is it because I was always thin without having to worry about it? Is it because I'm buying into the world's standard of beauty? I hate to admit, but I think the answer to these questions is YES.

So I've repented of my vanity, something I must do daily. I've committed myself to being healthy, to preventing heart disease, cancer, osteoporsis, diabetes, knee replacements, back problems...so that when I'm a grandma someday, I can be a busy, active, FUN grandma who can enjoy her children's children. That has become my focus, I pray that by God's grace, he will bless my efforts this time since it is from a heart that seeks to bring him glory through taking care of my temple of the Holy Spirit, and not from a heart that seeks to worship myself.

4 comments:

More power to you! I know it's hard to lose baby weight.

Thanks for visiting my blog. I'm so excited to have our friends moving here. They don't homeschool, but it will be nice having them around. My daughter is very excited to have her friends nearby.

God bless you!

October 10, 2007 at 11:53 AM  

What about looking "hot" for our husbands? Is that a bad motivation? or a public (or probably private) service?

October 10, 2007 at 2:01 PM  

In defense of your 'vanity,' it takes a certain amount of maturity - aka AGE - to come to a point where deep in your heart your focus is on being healthy, and not looking better. I know I thought you were beautiful in your picture a while back. I'm almost 45 and am almost to the 'I just want to be healthy stage.' But somewhere deep inside, I'll probably be 95 and wishing I was a hottie:)

October 10, 2007 at 3:17 PM  

Great post! What a great way to look at things.
To be healthy, I think, is the best goal!

October 10, 2007 at 9:18 PM  

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